The Friend Trail - Where to Start?

I met D just over a year and a half ago and they've been the happiest I've had in I don't know how long and long may it continue. We have a lovely flat (although it's a bitch to keep warm!), we have those gorgeous regular evenings in with a film snuggled up on the sofa with a glass of red wine and popcorn. We go to bed, 99.9% of the time together when D isn't working away from home. D goes out with the boys on a Saturday afternoon to watch the footie with his pals and have a few pints. I think this is fantastic. I just wish I had a few friends of my own!

To fill you in, I moved to Scotland in 2005 when I was still married. Prior to that we had lived in London for five years - I'd had a very good job in the City and had friends that I could go out with at the weekend for a drink or dancing. The Psycho is from Scotland originally and when he stated that we would be moving back I saw no reason to challenge him (stupidly!) as he was my husband. I know, this is a very old fashioned view, but you have no clue what sort of relationship I was in. I knew it would move me away from all my family, friends, a job I loved, but I felt that he was my husband and I should at least give it a go. So, we moved. My wonderful job in London translated into nothing up here as the job was so unique and the skills were not easily transferable. I ended up in a succession of dead-end admin jobs that I loathed as I could only find temporary work. I was never in one place long enough to make friends and The Psycho wanted me home pretty much straight from work. I had gone from London's lively metropolitan city, to a town in Scotland that was claustraphobic and made me feel uneasy. The Psycho had his football. I had knitting in front of a range of repeats on TV.

So, when I met Del, I didn't have girlfriends I could call up for a drink or a coffee. I had also moved town so it was in effect a clean start. I met his friends really early on and they're all wonderful - people I could spend time with although they are slightly younger than us. Turns out that even this is complicated and not as straight forward as it sounds. I was starting to think that maybe I would be welcomed into the female circle (as you would sort of expect) as they seemed nice. D's best friend is engaged to one of the girls in the group. Her best friend is D's ex. Shouldn't really have been an issue as D and his ex split six months prior to me meeting him. Ooooh, how wrong was I? A year and a half on I'm still unwelcome in the girls circle because of this fact. We don't get invited out to parties or get togethers where she is. Now, we're not talking about teenagers here, we're talking of girls of about 25-26. I could kinda see the point if I'd been involved in the intial break up, but it has nothing to do with me.

I joined the local book group at Waterstones, but this was full mainly of middle aged people or pensioners. I don't feel able to go for a drink on my own to a bar - I tried and failed. This is really frustrating. London was different as friendships seem to come about so easily. I even joined an online group of women who were looking for the same things as I was - turns out they're all middle aged as well. I'm not ready to make middle aged friends and I know how callous this sounds, but I still like to go dancing, I like to go out and get drunk occassionally, I like to be spontaneous and do childish things.

So, the big question is, how does a girl make friends in a new town? All suggestions gratefully welcomed, seriously!